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Why We Fast for Darfur - Days 20 & 21

 

I am finishing up my fast today.  Tomorrow, I’ll slowly begin to add food back into my diet.  For me, the hardest part of this action is over.  For those for whom we fast, it’s not even close.  And that is heartbreaking as I watch the world continue to ignore this genocide.  Not unlike the world ignored the genocide of Rwanda in 1994 – because our media was focused on OJ Simpson.  

On June 17, 1994, over 1,000 reporters waited for Simpson at the police station as our nation watched the circus of Simpson driving down the LA Freeway during a 35 mph low-speed pursuit.  Over twenty helicopters followed the chase.  It was covered live by ABC News anchors Peter Jennings and Barbara Walters for ABC’s  five newsmagazines, which achieved some their highest-ever ratings that week.  And genocide in Rwanda continued unchecked.

One thousand reporters??!  Where are 1,000 reporters clamoring for more information about Darfur?  About the atrocities committed against the Darfurian people?!  Where is the outrage?  It doesn’t exist.  And the world waits for the crisis to become so big that it can’t be ignored.  And hundreds of thousands or a million more will die.  And the world leaders will turn to Darfur as they finally turned to Rwanda, and Cambodia, and Bosnia, and Armenia and the Nazi Holocaust and …. And say, “We must stop this senseless killing”.  And they will be right.  But they (and we) will be late again.  And rage will fill the souls of those who were left to die unattended as we cared about everything but them.

While my fast ends tonight, and I begin again tomorrow to eat, I will not forget what I learned during these 21 days.  I learned that we are not the first, nor the last to peacefully protest an untenable situation.  That this action is only a step of many that must be taken.  That community comes together and supports one another when given the chance and that this is not the solution, but inevitably only an action in itself.  That action must continue or it is just an exercise.

Tonight I gathered with new friends of StopGenocideNow to discuss the issues of genocide.  Tremendous speakers who shared their wisdom and came to speak on one of the most beautiful days drippy Portland has seen so far this year.  And we shared our faith in being able to make a difference and became a unique community for just today that will grow from this point.

Resources to consider for Darfur:

Save Darfur (non profit organization to help Darfur)

Jewish World Watch (a call to conscience for the Jewish Community for Darfur)

Darfur Scores (Calling on Congress to stop genocide) Divest for Darfur (Sudan Divestment Task Force)

Stop Genocide Now (non profit organization to help Darfur – Organized the Fast Darfur movement for 21 days)

Call 1-800-GENOCIDE (1-800-436-6243) (Updated recordings about what to tell your representatives.  Then it automatically connects you to your representative or the White house – DOES NOT TRACK YOUR NUMBER – SO YOU WON’T BE ADDED TO SOME PHONE LIST - it tallies the NUMBER of calls – and volume matters)

Finally, ending with a quote given to me tonight –

How profound.  But all is not what it seems.  You may never know your affect on others.  But you will always know whether or not it was important enough to do – and the sacrifice will make a difference in the world and make you stronger for the action you took.  

Why We Fast for Darfur - Day 19

 

My fast is quickly coming to a close.  It didn’t feel like that 19 days ago – but my “sacrifice” is only for 3 weeks.  It is truly nothing compared to what those who live day in and day out without food face.  In fact in some ways it feels like a mockery of what they endure.  I have no idea what it’s like not to have food to eat or water to drink.  My denial of food has been very intellectual in the physical sense.  While I’ve eaten nothing in 19 days, it’s only 19 days.  (that STARVING feeling we often feel when we haven’t eaten for hours – is not starvation at all – it’s hunger).   When you fast, you lose hunger pangs.  You’re just empty.  And in this society, that’s not a bad thing at all.  

So I’m empty.  But only of food.  Not of hope or focus or frustration.  I’m full of all of those.  The frustration is obviously with how little attention the media has given this issue.  I mean this sincerely:  shame on the media for not taking up this issue with more interest and care.  I know there are sexier issues, but this ranks at the top of any list.  And the list is tucked away to be replaced with celebrities, politics, and posturing.  It’s so embarrassing to be part of a nation that will not keep its promises to those who have no ability to get help without the world’s focus.  

So I continue – with more than a little bit of frustration.   Note:  right now:  biggest trending topic on Twitter?  Star Trek.  

Monday in Portland, an event called CAMP DARFUR will be happening.  I’ll be there in both the Rwanda tent and then in the Darfur tent.  To answer questions, to tell what I know of what Rwanda looks like as a country whose genocide was ignored.  And to bring encouragement that what each of us can do to make a difference.   Hope to see you there. 

Why We Fast for Darfur - Days 17 & 18

 

It’s Thursday – I’m 3 ½ days from ending my fast.  In some ways not eating has gotten easier, and in some ways more difficult.

Eating for hunger is not an issue.  After just a few days, I wasn’t  hungry.  It’s just that I WANT to eat.  It’s so much a part of this culture.  Meetings are held around food – fundraisers – MEALS (ok – that last example was definitely the FAST brain speaking!) But seriously, it’s everywhere.  And the strangest things trigger the desire for food.  Yesterday I was in a meeting in a bar (nice bar I might add) and there was a bottle of A1 Sauce on the table – cozied up next to a bottle of Heinz 57 Sauce.  I could hardly take my eyes off of them!  And yet I continue because I know this time next week, I’ll have food in my belly once more.

When I think about getting food to the people of Darfur, I know how little it would take to give them nourishment to go on.  And then there’s the issue of water.  Jon Forman who fasted for 3 days on water only just turned the fast over to Peter Gabriel.  In his blog on the 14th he wrote the following:

“I’ve just received word that the Sudanese forces carried out a bombing raid on North Darfur today. And then this: In an IDP camp in west Darfur they ran out of water completely. I feel tremendously sad. Frustrated by the injustices and feeling ridiculously small in the face of it all”

Bombed. Ran out of water completely.  I have no idea what it would feel like to have those experiences.  And unless I’m stranded in Darfur or somewhere that’s been affected by a natural or manmade tragedy, I don’t think I’ll ever know those feelings.  But I’ve learned that I don’t have to relate – I need to respond.  I need to care.  And continue to speak about my desire to see this genocide end.  For only THEN will the world have the desire to help rebuild this part of the world.  

This fast gives me the opportunity to talk about Darfur.  My experience pales in relation to what is happening.  But it is what I can do now.  And for now, I will continue to do what I can, where I am, with what I have, in the time I have left.

Why We Fast for Darfur - Day 16

 

Today, I was discouraged.  Not about the fast.  About life in the US and a $$$$$ car repair bill!  When I got the call from my mechanic, and he told me the cost, I literally got sick to my stomach.  (Good thing it’s empty – that could have gone badly!!)

I became discouraged about figuring out how any of us get ahead with life doing its thing.  But one of the greatest gifts of this fast is to remember how “bad” I have it in comparison to those women in Darfur.  I turned to a daily meditation I’ve been reading for years called God Calling.  And the first paragraph for today held these words:  “Turn out all thoughts of doubt and of trouble.  Never tolerate them for one second.  Bar the windows and doors of your souls against them as you would bar your home against a thief who would steal in to take your treasures….”

I think about the people in Darfur who continue on despite monumental adversity.  And I remember to stay at peace.  To stay focused on what I can do, realize what I can’t control, and take action of what I want to change.  I can absolutely flip out about an unanticipated expense, or realize it’s just a consequence of owning a car.

The purpose of this fast is first and foremost for the people of Darfur.  But I am changing in profound ways through this – and none of it is bad.  

This fast is gathering more people.  There are now the following countries who have people declaring their solidarity with this movement:  Albania, Australia, Bulgaria, Canada, Chad, France, Germany, Greece, India, Italy, Jamaica, Kenya, Malaysia, Mexico, Nepal, Nigeria, Philippines, Puerto Rico, Romania, Senegal, Spain, Sudan, Thailand, UK, USA.  

In all of these countries, people are pausing to look away from their issues, their concerns, their worries to say NO:  genocide must not be allowed to go unabated.  And so we fast.  And there are many who want no publicity.  Who may not have made it through the first day and had to stop.  And yet in that exercise they realized how difficult it must be not to eat at all.  And worse, not be able to ‘stop’ because they didn’t feel well.

I say this all the time:  the people with whom I work in Rwanda change my life.  They remind me of what they have overcome, and so I will overcome in my own way as well.  And the car expense?  Well that stinks – but it’s just money.  It’s not life.  It’s not food.  It’s not water.  It’s not safety.  It’s an inconvenience.  And I’ll be fine.  But we continue for those that will not be fine given their challenges.  We continue to fast for Darfur.  And I feel strongly that it matters.

Why We Fast for Darfur - Day 15

 

photo credit:  BBC

Some good news and some disheartening news.  Typical in any normal day but the situation in Darfur is far from typical.  Every time we look away, more die and wonder why we didn’t care to do more.  There are grave injustices all over the world, but Darfur must be saved.  

There’s a tough op-ed piece in the New York Post about what President Obama is not doing in the Sudan.  I respect our President very much but admit his response is terribly disappointing.  

On the other hand, one man cannot do it all.  So we must all do what we can.  Richard Branson took over for Mia Farrow when she needed to stop fasting.  Now, Congressman Donald m. Payne, Chairman of the House Subcommittee on Africa and Global Health an outspoken leader in working towards ending the suffering in Darfur and bringing lasting peace to Sudan will be joining the Darfur Fast for Life movement.  Clearly, we are being heard.  Jon Foreman, front-man for multi-platinum rock band Switchfoot is also taking up the cause.  He has been an activist and cares deeply about the Darfur region of Sudan.

Other encouraging news:  Reported by the BBC:   Sudan's government says it will invite new aid groups to work in Darfur and allow those still operating there to expand their activities.

And then there are the rest of us.  No less important, just less visible.  Personally, my fast is going well.  I do not plan to end my fast until the 18th.  Does it matter?  It does, especially to me.  I cannot go to Darfur right now, but I will in the future.  And do what I can to make a difference. 

For now, this makes a difference.  And that’s the good news.

 

Why We Fast for Darfur - Days 13 and 14

 

 photo credit 

I must start this entry with a tribute to my Mother, affectionately known as Dead Rita.  She was magnificent as a mother.  And she was magnificent because she was flawed and did it anyway.  Born in 1931 illegitimate, to a mother who was less than stellar and often unquestionably cruel, she chose not to repeat the sins of her mother.  Dead Rita was talented, beautiful, wise, humble, artistic and wracked with self doubt and fears.  And she did it anyway.  

Stayed in a marriage for 43 years that brought her little joy, raised 3 children to the very best of her abilities, gave more than she received, and was grateful for the love of her children and grandchildren.  She has been gone for 10 ½ years and I think of her every day.  No day is harder than Mother’s Day – I celebrated her every year on this special day with the greatest of joy – she was my hero, the wind beneath my wings, the one person I know who loved me unconditionally and my best friend.  When she died in my arms on October 3, 1998, I felt a grief I could not have anticipated.  Having her die in front of me was heartbreaking and yet, I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.  Because I had no regrets.  I had done all I could for her.  

But what if I couldn’t have done that?  What if I couldn’t care for her and get her the medical treatment possible?  What if I couldn’t have fed her?  That instead of dying peacefully in my arms she had died at the hands of a killer, or of a curable disease, or alone?  These questions do not haunt me for her, but they haunt me for the people of Darfur.  

As painful as it is to watch a parent die in this country, I can’t imagine the excruciating mental agony of a child watching their mother die before them with no knowledge of how they will carry on.  It is that vision that keeps me focused and resolved to not eat until May 18, 21 days after I began this fast.  

We continue to fast for Darfur because every human soul deserves the right to live with some basic needs met.  Food, water, safety, a chance to make their way in the world, in whatever way fits their circumstances, their culture, their time.  The people of Darfur barely are surviving.  And have NONE of these basic needs.  So we protest.  And we protest peacefully.  War is not the answer.

Yesterday in my mediation class we had a reading of Thich Nhat Hanh from his book:  Miracle of Mindfulness, A Manual on Meditation.  Thinking of my fast and this work we do to help those who cannot speak for themselves, there was a passage read about a man who was so angry and Nhat Hanh responded peacefully.  I was struck by this because I know I cannot be angry with everyone who doesn’t get it, doesn’t care or thinks I’m crazy to take this action.

Nhat Hanh’s response to this question, “Why not be angry with him, “I asked.  “Even pacifists have a right to be angry.”   He responded:  “If it were just myself, yes.  But I am here to speak for Vietnamese peasants.  I have to show them that we can be at our best.”  (From The Miracle of Mindfulness by Thich Nhat Hahn).

He said this at the height of the Vietnam War when he came to the US to speak at churches and any place where people would gather to hear the other side of the story of Vietnam.  A Buddhist Monk.  Who knew he must do what he could, regardless of the outcome.  

That is why we fast for Darfur.  To draw attention to an untenable situation.  And say:  no more.  Stop the killing.  Get more humanitarian aid to people who are starving while we gorge at Mother’s Day buffets (well, not me today – but usually!)

Take Action. 

Fast.  Pray.    Write to the President.  Get involved in your local efforts to draw attention to Darfur.  Give to nationally recognized organizations intent of bring help.  

And be thankful.  For all you have.  For all you will have.  And know you can make a difference.

Why We Fast for Darfur - Day 12

                          (child's drawing of the killer Janjaweed in Darfur)                         photo credit Mia Farrow

I am happy to be in double digits on this fast and for me the end is in sight:  I know that in 9 days it will be over, for me.  

This morning when I was thinking about that I realized that those in Darfur have no end in sight.  No belief that it will ever end.  And they have no idea we weep for them.  Or fear for them.  Or struggle to know if any of this will make a difference.  And as I write this, more than one child has died.  More than one woman has been brutally raped and humiliated.  More than one man has screamed in agony as he dies, unable to protect his family from the Janjaweed and the government backed killings.  As I write this I gasp at the horror of what I’ve written.  And the horror of it reaches my soul.  

I don’t usually write this graphically.  But I’ve seen the poverty in Rwanda, I’ve walked past genocide memorials where there are thousands of bones and skulls stacked neatly representing the dug up mass graves.  I’ve seen the skeletons frozen with lime and the faces of agony in death.  In Israel, I visited Yad Vashem over 25 years ago and saw the aftermath of the Holocaust.  And while seeing is believing, too much of that only causes people to look away.  Which doesn’t help.  So know I come from a place of knowing as well I can, considering I’m a white woman safely living in the U.S., who has seen enough to know we must do more.  I co-founded the foundation for Rwanda because I knew I must do more.  I have traveled to Rwanda six times in 3 1/2 years.

Richard Branson has taken over for Mia Farrow in the FastDarfur campaign.  She can no longer continue due to health reasons.  It is good she is stopping.  Richard Branson will become another spokesperson for this cause.  It is a sacrifice on his part. On the FastDarfur website he states:

“I’m honoured to be taking over the fast for the next three days from Mia Farrow in her courageous stance to support the people of Darfur. Over a year and a half ago, I travelled to Darfur and was horrified by the stories that people of all ages shared with us. Young children had watched their entire family get killed and then had to survive on their own in unimaginable conditions. I was humbled and inspired by the courage of the Darfuri people and the commitment of the aid organisations that were working on the frontlines. Now, with 13 aid organisations expelled from the country, over 1m people are at grave risk. We cannot stand and watch as 1m people suffer. We all need to stand up and demand that international aid is restored and that the people of Darfur are protected and given the chance to live in peace.”

This is not easy and no amount of money makes you feel better when you can’t eat.  And the people of Darfur can’t eat.  And so we stand in solidarity with them.  

To raise our voices and raise awareness.  

Have you been moved to call the White House?  (202)456-1111  Don’t worry if you don’t know what to say.  Say what you believe about the atrocities being committed in Darfur and ask the President to help restore humanitarian aid and end the genocide.  You cannot believe what a difference our calls are making.  My brother called and was told by the operator that they’re getting many many calls and THAT is what it will take:  the American people saying, “Enough”.  (you don’t leave your name – it’s the issues they’re tracking).  If you want to write the White House, go to my blog for Day 11 and get the info.  

Feel uneducated about Darfur?  Watch this 20 minute video on SaveDarfur.org for excellent background and history. Darfur:  A Call to Action – Lessons from Faith Leaders

Why We Fast for Darfur - Day 11

http://www.whitehouse.gov/CONTACT/

LETTER TO PRESIDENT OBAMA SENT TO THE WHITE HOUSE (see link above)

Dear President Obama,

I am now on day 11 of a 21 day fast for Darfur.  Liquids only:  about 400 calories a day.  

I'm not sure what an activist is supposed to look like, but I never thought it would be me.  I can step aside no longer.

I'm a 51 year old professional woman who is moved to ask you to change the atrocities being committed in Darfur.  I co-founded the Itafari Foundation for the people of Rwanda and have spoken at the United Nations about our need to help those who have been ignored and abused.  Darfur continues to be the reality that nothing is truly being done.  

In addition to running a Foundation with no financial gain or recompense for my expenses or actions, I am an executive coach and international speaker.  My topic and passion:  communication and leadership.

I believe in you and ask for your focus and the focus of the Administration on this issue.  Please.  But I'm also a pragmatic businesswoman who knows this is not just a phone call or a speech.  Please put resources towards getting the humanitarian groups back into the Darfur region, and then, end this genocide.

Working in Rwanda teaches me that if action is not taken, we will look back and regret what we did not have time to correct.  

You can read more about my fast at:  http://victoriatrabosh.com/blog

To read more about the work in Rwanda, http://itafari.org

Thank you Mr. President.  I know you can do this.

Sincerely,

Victoria H. Trabosh

 

 

Why We Fast for Darfur - Day 10

 

 

Had “lunch” today with an 87 year old dear friend of mine.  We’ve been friends for well over 20 years and get together for lunch about monthly.  We were scheduled to get together last Wednesday but I was only 3 days into my liquids only fast (about 400/cal/day) and I didn’t want to push my resolve too far.  Today, when my office manager told him I was still not eating, he wanted to cancel.  But I insisted we get together.  He’s very aware of world affairs, Jewish, and connected in the world.  He and friends at the retirement home where he lives sponsor children through the Itafari Foundation which I co-founded.  (Imagine:  Jewish elders in our community helping children of a genocide – they get it).  

But his fear was for my health.  And also he feared it wouldn’t make a difference.  Fair concerns.  The eating one is not difficult.  As I told him:  the MINUTE I’m not well I can eat.  Or seek medical care.  Or rest.  Basically, get well soon.  Not so for those with whom we stand in solidarity.  They don’t feel well – they can starve, become violently ill, possibly die, and then leave a trail of tears.  It is for them I resist the desire to eat anything.  Will I make it 21 days?  We’ll see.  I’ve gone 17 in the past.

His other fear:  will it make a difference?  Eighty seven years of life give him tremendous perspective.  He knows how hard it is to change people.  And to change a nation?  It will take the collective focus of our President and the Executive Branch and the people who fight the good fight.   I truly appreciate Mia Farrow making this an issue and a focus.  She sees atrocities and knows action is required.  What is required of us?  Whatever we can do.

1.    Fast for a Day.
2.    Fast for 21 Days.
3.    Symbolically give up food for a meal – and remember why you’re doing it.
4.    Call the White House and ask President Obama to do more:  202-456-1111
5.    Donate to the cause:  www.SaveDarfur.org is one of my favorites, but there are many – look them up on Google
6.    Educate yourself. Book suggestion:  Not on Our Watch:  The Mission to End Genocide in Darfur and Beyond (authors Don Cheadle and John Prendergast)

A dear friend, Nancy Grant, who is also fasting with me, came up with these reminders of what this can mean here in the U.S. to fast.  (a bit more lighthearted but only because the issues are so grave – I actually think they’re also excellent!) Because this only works if it works at all levels.
•    Money savings - I don't buy groceries, go out to eat, or grab an occasional latte.  I'm not using the stove or dishwasher so save gas, electricity and water.
•    Time savings - I don't grocery shop, cook, or exercise.
•    Losing those last 10 pounds I've been wanting to lose for a year or two.

So we continue.

Why We Fast for Darfur - Day 9

 

God bless Larry King!  No, that’s not a lightheaded remark after not eating for 9 days – it’s a celebration of the fact that he’s featuring Mia Farrow tonight on his show!  He had her on the first day and she’ll be back on tonight to talk about the Fast and the issues.  So, watch it on CNN

What else is happening?  Not a whole heck of a lot.  President Obama and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton both promised to work to end the Darfur crisis.  To date, it hasn’t happened.  I could post some YouTube videos of their campaign promises but it won’t help.  I haven’t missed the fact that they’re both extremely caught up in other world issues. 

But I know this one can’t wait.  I would hate for them to call this the biggest mistake of the administration, (ignoring another genocide), as President Clinton has stated time and time again.

I know for certain that President Clinton spends a lot of time in Rwanda without press coverage, without fanfare, to help right a wrong against a nation that began on April 7, 1994.  

Can we afford to do this again with Darfur in the future?  I pray it is not so.  
We must act.  And we must fast.  And we must not give up hope.

I appreciate all efforts to raise this issue to the forefront.  But issues are like a pack of kids vying for the teacher’s attention.  The economy kid, the H1N1 kid, the war kid, the terrorist threat kid, the unemployment kid, the bank kid, the auto kid, they’re all in the front.  Our little Darfur kid gets pushed to the back of the pack and stands quietly wondering how he’ll ever get noticed.  Some of us are noticing.  So hang in there kid.